The Authority Gap Is Real: How to Stay Sane (and Get Seen) in a World That Doubts You

Have you ever felt like you had to over-prepare just to be taken seriously? Or been talked over, interrupted, or underestimated—even when you’re clearly the most qualified person in the room?

You’re not imagining it.

In this episode, Eimear breaks down the Authority Gap—what it is, how it shows up in women’s lives and careers, and what you can actually do to navigate it without losing your mind (or your job). This one is packed with powerful stats, real-life stories, and five tangible strategies you can start using right away.

Whether you're in a corporate role, building your own thing, or figuring out what’s next—this episode will remind you of your power, and help you reclaim your voice in spaces that haven’t always made it easy.

 In this episode:

• What the Authority Gap really is (and why it still exists)
• How it affects your confidence, career, and internal narrative
• 5 actionable strategies to help you reclaim your voice and space
• Real stories of women navigating bias with grounded power
• Why waiting for fairness is a trap—and what to do instead

Links & Resources:

• Free Morning Reset Audio – Start your day grounded in confidence: https://www.subscribepage.com/my-morning-reset
• Book a Breakthrough Call with Eimear – Ready to close the gap for good? Let’s talk:https://eimearzone.as.me/breakthrough

💬 Let’s keep the conversation going:

DM Eimear on Instagram @eimearzone with the word CIRCLE if you want to join a community of bold women rewriting the rules.

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© 2025 Eimear Zone Coaching. All rights reserved.

Transcript

Eimear Zone:
If you have ever felt like you had to over-prepare just to be taken seriously, or like you were being talked over, doubted, or passed over despite being the most qualified person in the room—well, you are not imagining it. It's a very familiar experience for many women, and today we're talking about the authority gap: what it is, how it shows up in our lives and careers, and what we can actually do to navigate it without losing your sanity, your self-worth, or your shot at the life that you want.

So welcome to this episode, and let's get into it. What is the authority gap? Well, it's a term that was coined by a journalist whose name is Mary Ann Sieghart—and I hope I'm pronouncing that right, Mary Ann—and this is how she describes it:
 The authority gap is the consistent tendency to take men more seriously than women by default, and to doubt, interrupt, or ignore women's expertise unless or until it's proven.

So just think about that. If you're a woman of a certain age who's reached mid-career or midlife, it's likely that you will have had some experience of the authority gap. Here's a statistic from a Yale University study: when male and female resumes were absolutely identical, the male candidate was rated as more competent and offered a higher salary.

Another one—in the legal profession. This is just from the Financial Times a few months ago: in the legal profession, women make up 47% of lawyers, but hold only 38% of leadership positions. I used to work in that profession—in the UK—and I remember one female full partner at the law firm. She was a rare creature, first of all. She had an unusual life in that she had a child, she wasn't married, and she had two full-time nannies to help her look after that child so she could maintain her high-level leadership role in the legal profession at that time. This is about 20 years ago. I don't think an awful lot has changed, unfortunately.

I was surrounded by women—many of whom were married or thinking about having children—and there was this feeling that you were going to be off-track even as an associate or senior associate if you had a child. And there was just this one female partner who was the example of how you make it in that environment, in leadership. She was living with quite a unique circumstance in her personal life—not something that any male senior lawyer was dealing with.

So that statistic didn’t surprise me one bit.

We all absorb the same messages—that men are naturally confident, competent leaders and women are not. Even women internalize these beliefs. That’s what Mary Ann Sieghart says in her book.

Disturbing, statistically real, and alive today: the authority gap. And we’re talking about unconscious bias to a large extent.

There was another example given in the Financial Times recently, saying that a female economist was rated as 20% more persuasive than her male peers—but only when her credentials were visible to them. Only when there were those clear signals.

And it isn't just about boardrooms and these professional areas or politics—it shows up in everyday life too: in how you're spoken to at work, whether your ideas are credited, whether you're promoted, or even how you speak to yourself.

So let's look at how the authority gap shows up. See where you recognize it in your own life, in your own experience. Sometimes it's subtle—so subtle that you almost miss it.

One: You're interrupted or talked over—often by men.
Here's a statistic: 39% of women say they're regularly interrupted in meetings, versus only 20% of men. It sends a subconscious signal: your voice is less important.

The second way it can show up is that you're mistaken for someone junior.
18% of women have been mistaken for more junior roles—even when they are the ones who are in charge.

I remember I had a great boss when I worked for a global publishing company many years ago. I was on the sales team and really just getting my start—learning the ropes, managing accounts, responsible for bringing in a large target in terms of financial bookings.

This great male boss and I would be in a meeting where a potential client was coming to see us at our offices—we worked in the European headquarters of this publishing company. And you know, the normal thing is that you're bringing in some refreshments into the meeting. So there would be coffee and tea arriving, or pastries, whatever—and my boss never once let me stand up and pour a cup of coffee for anybody. He always did it.

And that was a really big signal that he was sending. Because I was in charge of the meeting—even though I was significantly younger than he was—he was there sort of as backup. He sent this signal by doing that, and I'll never forget it. And the eyes stayed on me as I managed the meeting then.

So the second one—you’re mistaken for someone junior. But that boss I had really helped with that one.

And the third one is: you're doubted until proven.
Kind of like that point about the female economist being rated 20% more persuasive than her male peers—but only when her credentials were visible, right?

So you're doubted until proven.
 Clients might second-guess you.
 Colleagues repeat your ideas—and then they land. You know, when somebody else repeats it, suddenly it's worthy of attention or to be taken seriously.

And the worst part about all of this, I think, is that although the individual moments might seem small—they affect us.
 They compound.
 They have this cumulative ripple effect, and it just drains confidence. You tend to shrink.
 And your ambition tends—to shrink. And it makes us question if it's even worth speaking up, if it's even worth going for the promotion, if it's even worth really looking at that more senior leadership position and going for it.

If this is landing hard, I want you to hear me: it isn't about you being good enough. It's about the environment. It's about the environment and how we've been conditioned to operate within it.

And when you think about it, young girls typically have been praised—we've been praised—for being nice and quiet and well-behaved. Not too loud. Not too bold. Not too opinionated. And probably, if we spoke over anybody, we would have known about it and been corrected. Less likely that the boys would have been.

Even today, men will overestimate their abilities, while women tend to underestimate theirs. There’s a famous Cornell University study on this—even when they have identical performance, women underestimate their abilities. And that costs us. That feeds into the authority gap.

So confidence—I believe, I’ve always believed—is something we are born with. It's naturally part of our makeup, and it belongs to us just as much as it belongs to any other human being who happens to be male.

But it’s conditioned out of us in our environments. We absorb these small, subtle—and not so subtle—signals over a lifetime. And they build up.

The people who are speaking over us, who are interrupting us, who are repeating our ideas and then it seems like it's theirs—they were also conditioned. They also picked up signals from their environment. Maybe they saw men speaking over women. Maybe they saw their father speaking over their mother and that was okay. All sorts of different environments people grew up in—but a very common thread, often.

And all of this? It's kind of fucking annoying, isn’t it?

It’s really annoying. Because you've experienced it. I've experienced it. It's so familiar.

But it doesn't mean that we're stuck. The good news is that there are things we can do. There are ways we can navigate this terrain and this reality in ways that don’t just wear us out or break us—but can actually make us bolder.

And I think it's so important to talk about this from the female perspective. Because whenever I’m talking about confidence—gender matters. It matters when you’re a woman in the workplace. Confidence is different for women.

I’ll speak about that in more detail, but let’s talk about some tangible strategies that we as women can look to use—strategies I’ve seen people use effectively—to help close the gap.

Number one: Speak up in a way that gets heard.
And that is—narrate your value. Clearly and often.
Don’t wait to be recognized. Don’t wait to be asked. Start narrating your wins, your strengths, and your impact out loud.

Just as an example—I had a client, we’ll call her Sasha, in.....a STEM leadership role, right? And she began this habit—this practice—over a period of three months, of emailing weekly highlights to her manager. Weekly wins. Things that she thought he should know about.

She took the initiative—very friendly, well thought out, short but impactful emails—that were landing in her boss's inbox every week. And within a quarter, she was offered a stretch opportunity that she had previously been overlooked for.

So: narrate your value clearly and often. Don’t wait to be asked.

The second strategy I think is really important and really helpful—and that is about managing our inner landscape. Stay calm and grounded when you’re challenged.
Your nervous system is like your secret weapon.

When someone talks over us, or interrupts us, or questions our authority—breathe.
 We can get into reaction mode way too quickly and become defensive—and then we’re losing ground. So we want to stay grounded when challenged.
 Take the breath.
 Hold eye contact.
 Slow down your speech.
 The cadence of your speech is a really important signal.

Slow down—and reclaim the floor.

You can use a simple practice for this—an inner anchor breath: three deep belly breaths, feet flat on the floor. You can do this in a busy meeting. It can be very discreet.

And respond with something like:
 “Thank you. I’d like to finish what I was saying.”

Your tone’s important here. Obviously it’s not:
 “THANK YOU. I’M going to finish what I was saying, you asshole.”

You don’t even have to say “you asshole”—it’ll be heard in your tone.

And although it’s rude to be interrupted—and yes, they were wrong, blah blah blah—we’ve got to play the game to be effective.

So your tone matters.

And it also helps—I know this is going to sound annoying—but to smile.

“Thank you. I’d like to finish what I was saying.”
“Sure. Thanks.”

And then continue—and smile.

It works. It works. And if you do it consistently, you’ll find that the number of times you get interrupted or spoken over is likely to diminish.

So: calm and grounded when challenged.
 And it helps to have a preloaded phrase like that for when you’re interrupted:

“Thank you. I’d like to finish what I was saying.”

And then finish what you were saying.
 You don’t want to be struggling for the words. It’s really helpful to have a stock phrase.

Number three: Use credibility cues intentionally.
What I mean by that is—in environments where bias is real—sometimes showing receipts matters.

Don’t be afraid to lead with your experience when you sense the room might need reminding.

For example, you might say:

“As someone who’s led teams across three continents…”

...Here’s my fabulous bloody idea—you better all listen up!
 (Okay, maybe not that second part.)

So you show receipts. You lead with your authority. You lead with your experience.

You’ll get into your own style on this. But again—it’s helpful. You’re an expert on the environment in which you’re operating, and the individuals and personalities that are there—and what will land best.

So do a little audit and think about preparing some stock phrases like that:

“As someone who’s led teams across three continents…”

Use these credibility cues with intention—when you feel the room needs to be reminded.

Number four: This one is so important—and so powerful—for women.
Create a circle that sees you.
A trusted circle of women who reflect your brilliance back to you is not a luxury.
It’s a bloody lifeline.

You need this.

A circle that sees you.

This is what Amy Cuddy said:

“Confidence is contagious. And so is self-doubt.”

We are influenced by the energy of the people around us. Emotions are contagious.
 Confidence is contagious.
 And so is self-doubt.

Create a circle around you that really sees you, builds you up, and reflects your brilliance back to you.
 A circle that helps you craft things like those credibility cues…
 Or the perfect phrase you can use—with that smile and that calm tone—when someone interrupts you. So that you can get things back on track, and stay the center of attention, sharing your brilliant ideas in important, influential meetings.

If you're thinking, “I don’t have a circle like that, but I need one…”
Just DM me the word CIRCLE.

If you’re looking for a community to join, I might be able to help you there.

Fifth and final strategy: Interrupt the internalized doubt.

We’ve spoken about the conditioning.
 We’ve all been influenced by it as we grew up.

So it’s not just the external voices that are causing us problems—it’s the internalized doubt.

You’ve got to catch those inner thoughts of doubt in the act—and rewire them.

And I have a really good practice for this. I call it The Morning Reset.
It’s a really short audio with kind of a daily mantra, like:

“I trust myself.”
“I know what I’m doing.”
“My voice matters.”

We really have to curate the internal messaging that we’re allowing to take our attention and focus.

Too often, we are not managing our attention—and the internal narrative is running old stories of doubt:
 That we’re less than.
 That the idea isn’t good enough.
 That we aren’t good enough.

So it's really important to get ahead of that—and begin to reprogram it.

The Morning Reset audio is a great place to start.
Less than three minutes.
Telling yourself what a badass you are. First thing in the morning. Just listen.

I’ll put it in the show notes for you so you can find it easily and download it.

...of DEIA getting cut, funding pulled, and disappointing behaviors in many arenas.

So we can't wait for the world to do the right thing. For businesses to do the right thing.

We don't have to wait.

We can really choose ourselves now—in a profound and powerful way—by looking at these strategies.

And yes, we could say, “I shouldn’t have to do it. It should be fairer. I shouldn’t be spoken over. I should be respected. I shouldn’t be underestimated.”

Fucking waste of time.

As someone who’s worked in law—and worked in discrimination law—it is the least effective thing you can do to improve your experience in your workplace: waiting for other people to do the right thing.

You have to claim the space yourself.

Choose yourself.
Claim the space without apology.
And lead like the fabulous, amazing woman that you are—with soul, with truth, and with power.

Lean into some of these strategies. And if you’ve found other ones that you’re using—or that you’re going to experiment with—let me know. I’d love to hear more on this topic from people who are actively navigating these challenges in their own way.

The Authority Gap—yes, it’s real.

And so is your power.

So: stay sane.
 It can feel pretty wild west and crazy out there sometimes.
 Get seen—for all the right reasons.
 And keep showing up like the future depends on it—because in a way, it really does.

Thanks for your attention this week.
 If this landed for you, go grab the free Morning Reset audio—the link is in the show notes. It’s my favorite tool to come back to self-trust when things have slipped a little in the internal narrative.

Or—if you’re ready to close this gap for good—book a Breakthrough Call, and let’s talk about what it would look like to be done with self-doubt.

I’ll see you next time.
 Stay awesome.
 Bye.